Awake at 3:00 AM, I feel a pain that immediately convinces me I’m about to die. It’s a stabbing pain I am familiar with, but familiarity helps not when it comes to stabbing pains, in my experience. I make sounds that I am immediately aware might sound sexual, if in fact I were in an act of sex. This would make me laugh, if not for the stabbing pains that caused it. I know the drill: bathroom, wait, make claim to understanding 24 hours of labor pain.
I’ll fast forward to 4:00 AM. I’m wide awake and pain free. I look at the uncurtained window with the shutters we rarely close. The sky is not dark but it’s not light. I wonder at the human eye. I decide to go for a 10k run. The cycle lane is free at this time. It’s mine.
I get ready in the light-dark-light and again wonder at the capacity of the human eye. The dogs are asleep. It’s pre-dawn. I’m going for a run.
I hit the street at 4:17 AM. There’s a man on the corner and not a soul other than him. I wonder what the fuck he’s doing and then realize he’s looking at me asking the same thing. Or could well be.
I set off, running in the middle of the road, down the dotted line. I note it’s the first time I have run that line.
I reach the traffic lights that cross to the beach and they are off. I’ve never seen that before, but it makes sense. I run across the road and jag sharp left onto the cycle lane. It is flat and empty, and I am relaxed.
It’s a near perfect run, like a track but no bends to run. I feel the power in my backside but then remember 70% of it comes from the heel. I read that somewhere. My backside doesn’t know it’s done a deal with my heels. My heart is unburdened. My lungs think it’s just another day. Every single part of me is working.
I finish the run and walk awhile. The stabbing pain comes back and I am reminded that nothing is ever simple. I find a clean toilet and feel like a King on his throne.